To the question of your life…

“I’m disappointed in you.”

“You’re so dumb” or “You have a deficient I.Q.”

Upon hearing such words directed at them, an average person will be filled with deep emotions and hot retorts/denials which they might either let out or choose to hold in

In this kind of situation, I think the first thing to do is to ask yourself if the person is right or not.

If they are right, then it’s up to you to take steps to improve yourself. The best revenge they say, is success not the hot words or tears that are bubbling within and begging to be let out. Success can be achieved through learning as the purpose of learning is for us to be at our best.

If they are wrong, then it’s either the person is feeling miserable and trying to make you feel as miserable as they do or there is a conflict in ideology

Sometimes, people tend to consciously or unconsciously take out their frustrations on others they consider “beneath” them and this person who might look up to them ends up swallowing whatever they say hook, line and sinker. The best thing to do here is to not give them the satisfaction of getting you down. They’re like vampires, they want to feed off your reaction.

Also, some people find it difficult to accept other ways of doing things or thinking that is not the same as theirs. They completely refuse to compromise or look at things from a different perspective. As long as you have checked within and you don’t find yourself lacking, you’re good to go.

These expressions and their other variations are very strong. So, as a speaker, you should consider very carefully if you really have to say them. That is, don’t use these words on others unless you really mean them or the situation warrants. In fact, ask yourself if you really mean them or you’re saying it because you belong to a different school of thought or due to momentary annoyance as their effects last long.

Why am I putting this out there?

Because I have been at the receiving end of such demeaning retorts and still remember vividly how I felt until I decided not to let such words affect my psyche anymore. Before this resolution however, I heard such words so many times that I began to loose confidence. I wondered if this person who’s so close to me and claims to know me even better than I know myself was right afterall.

From there, I went on a downward spiral and I was too embarrassed to speak about it to anyone. Eventually, I took the initiative to speak to a few people who gave me the confidence to overcome the effects of this brainwashing and gradually regain my identity/ self esteem.

Such demeaning words could be coming from close friends, relatives, siblings, colleagues and even your parents. Some people are just toxic, if you can, get away from them, if not, I hope you get to a place where their words don’t hit you where it hurts.

After all, “to the question of your life, you’re the only answer.” Don’t let anybody tell you what is not or stifle your thoughts and opinions by claiming they know you better than you know yourself.

Published by Keyscribes

I'm a lover of words in all forms

2 thoughts on “To the question of your life…

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